Family Picnic
by I. H. Scribe
Summary: The Losers end up in trouble with an angry sorcerer, who decides to magically summon their family members to punish them. It doesn't work out as the sorcerer had hoped.


Fandoms: The Losers, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Characters: The Losers, The Scooby Gang

Prompt: Unknown family

Prompt Made By: I. H. Scribe

Disclaimer: I don't own the following series(es) or any character(s) that follow, and unless _I. H. Scribe_ is listed after _Prompt Made By_ chances are I don't own the idea for this story either.

* * *

Roque roared in anger as he smacked the invisible wall again. Jensen was rambling about the various myths of spells and magic-users. And wasn't that something? Magic.

Clay certainly hadn't expected that.

What should have been a simple retrieval mission ended up being a hostage situation with _them_ as the hostages.

"How much longer are you planning to keep us in here?" Roque snarled at the wizard – sorcerer – whatever that had trapped them in an invisible box.

"Just a little longer," he said. "You'll suffer for interfering in my plans before you die." He sprinkled some sort of powder over the circles he had drawn earlier. "Now just a little blood."

"Is that our blood? Why is he using our blood? Why are you using our blood?" Jensen asked.

"Your blood, your offspring," the sorcerer said. He began chanting.

"I don't have any offspring," Jensen said. "But if he touches my niece he's a dead man." The other Losers were stunned by the viciousness in the usually easy-going man's voice.

None of the other Losers had any offspring either. Pooch and his wife were trying, but no luck yet. Except, whatever _magic_ the sorcerer was doing, was actually summoning people.

Clay and Jensen both apparently had daughters, a blonde and a redhead respectively. And Cougar and Roque both apparently had sons, ones with brown hair and blue hair respectively.

"Alright," Clay's daughter asked. "Get with the splainey. What's going on?"

* * *

Buffy had been having such a nice day. Three years after Sunnydale's fall, she, Willow, Xander, and surprisingly Oz, had decided to have a picnic. It was a beautiful day. The sun was out, there was a nice breeze, and Oz had led them to a nice little section of beach that no one else was on.

She should have known something would go wrong.

In the blink of an eye, the four of them had gone from a nice beach picnic to a dark room with a crazy looking magic user.

"Alright. Get with the splainey. What's going on?" she asked.

"You're here as punishment to your fathers."

"Punsihment?" Willow asked.

"Yes."

"Us?" Xander asked. "Seriously?"

"Yes."

"Huh," Oz said.

"Punishment how exactly?" Buffy asked.

"I'm going to kill you of course."

"_You_ are going to kill _us_," Buffy said.

"Yes."

Buffy stared at the man in disbelief, and then began laughing. Xander and Willow followed suit. Even Oz was shaking mysteriously while keeping his mouth clamped shut.

"Sorry, I'm sorry," Buffy said, still laughing, "I shouldn't laugh at the evil plan I know, but seriously?" She laughed harder. "You? Kill us?"

"Oh my goddess, Buffy, stop," Willow said. "I can't." Willow was laughing to hard to continue.

"Yeah, I don't think so," Xander said.

"Well, why not?" the sorcerer asked, petulantly.

"Let's see. Practically all of the Aurelius clan tried to kill us and failed. The Mayor of our town turned into a giant snake demon to eat us at graduation and failed. Military created demon-robot hybrid tried to kill us and failed. Hell goddess tried to kill us and failed. Well, she killed Buffy."

"Until Willow resurrected me," Buffy said. Willow let out a sound that may have been 'eep'.

"Then there was well," Xander glanced at Willow.

"I kinda went all end-the-world's-pain-by-destroying-it for a while," Willow admitted. "But then there was The First Evil."

"Also tried to kill us. Also failed. And those were all actually scary," Xander said. "You, not so much."

The sorcerer looked down at his wardrobe. It was the proper attire for an evil sorcerer of his magnitude – the Sinister Mage robe, boots, and gloves; and okay, so he stole a floppy wizard's hat from a random costume shop, but he had dyed it to match the rest of his outfit.

"Willow, can you get us out of here?" Buffy asked.

"Already did," Willow said. The circles underneath them had disappeared while Xander was talking to the sorcerer.

"How could you break the ritual circles?" the sorcerer asked in shock.

"Shush," Willow said, and the sorcerer's mouth disappeared.

"Wills," Buffy said.

"What? His voice was really annoying?"

"Did you resurrect my parents?" Oz asked.

"No. Why?"

"He said we were here to punish our fathers. My parents have been dead for years."

"I didn't resurrect them," Willow said. "But I wonder…what could Ira, Tony, and Hank have done to piss off a sorcerer."

"Ooo?" the sorcerer asked, muffled.

"What?" Buffy asked.

"I think he said, 'Who?'," Xander said.

"Willow," Buffy said. The sorcerer's mouth reappeared. "Now, what'd you say?"

"Who are Ira, Tony, and Hank?" the sorcerer asked.

"Our fathers," Buffy said.

"No, they are," the sorcerer said, nodding to an empty space behind them.

"I don't see anyone."

"Me neither," Willow said. "No, wait, hold on. I think." Willow said a few words in latin, and five men appeared out of nowhere. "There they are."

There was an awkward silence as the Losers stared at their children.

"So," Xander said finally, "Family picnic?"

* * *

In case it wasn't made clear in-story: Buffy is Clay's daughter, Willow is Jensen's daughter, Oz is Cougar's son, and Xander is Roque's son. Since this is Movie!verse Losers, Xander is only summoned as Roque's son because of three things:

One: Roque was the soldier that possessed Xander during the episode _Halloween._

Two: Magic goes wonky around Xander.

Three: He happened to be near the other three when they were summoned at the same time.

As always, I am accepting prompts, however, I am not accepting prompts through reviews. If you wish to give me a prompt, please see the Accepting Prompts section of my profile for instructions. Thank you.

I. H. Scribe


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